Bean Curd Ramen

Here's the stuff we're gonna be cookin' today. Hmm. What's that weird compressed spongy-thingus? Will it absorb water and swell up like a cheap dimestore sponge? Guess it's fried bean curd or something. And what's up with these double wide noodles?!
Now, get some water into a pan and stick it on the coil dealie that gets hot. Turn it on high and throw the noodlebits(tm) from the package in there if you're extra-hungry. Adding pr0ns or shrimp to the water as it boils is extra tasty and adds class. Oh right, this is a Bachelor's Guide. Rip open that foil package and dump that crap in the water! It should explode with violence as it shows its displeasure.
Stick the noodleblock(tm) into the water and wait for the water to melt the starchy glue holding that shit together. After that happens, add the mystery food sponge stuff and watch it grow, grow, GROW! Stir that crap around so it all gets soaked with the brown Mystery Juice.
Get your strainer dealie ready and dump the whole mess into it. NOTE: be sure to orient it properly so the stuff gets caught and the Mystery Juice flows through! Don't get it backwards or else the garbage disposal will get a free snack. There. All this hard work is finally gonna pay off! Time to eat it. Hmm... that bean curd stuff sure is weird!

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